Yes, I didn’t write anything HERE yesterday, though I did write–just not for public consumption. I’ve realized that when I’m at work, I tend to get morose, depressed, overly self-judgmental, highly reactive emotionally–obviously, I need to change my work environment. And I’m working on that, but it’s a long-term process (at least as long as the company stays in business…).
I linked to a blog on Simple Mindfulness this morning that was titled Experimenting with Failure. I expected it to be the usual commentary on how you have to fail to move forward, but I was jolted out of my complacency by the very beginning, where she said,
I don’t believe in failure. The word doesn’t have a purpose or meaning in my life.
Everything I do is an experiment: Test. Assess the results. Learn something and take the next step.
Sound familiar? It’s the scientific method!
My goddess, what a simple concept, a guidance on how to live a life. Life presents countless opportunities; we are constantly choosing what to do (or, in far too many cases, not do). Instead of looking at each opportunity as a measured step on a predetermined path–as an act leading to a particular outcome–consider it a chance to expand, to bring new knowledge and joy into your environment.
I know someone who does this supremely well: my sister, who celebrated her birthday yesterday. (Everybody say, Happy Birthday Peg!) Her life has gone through a series of twists and turns and heartaches and knockdowns and resurrections and explorations and she never stops! She has learned to listen to her heart and follow her interests and passions. She has organizational and managerial skills, creative and artistic talents, and interests that she has learned to follow to see where they take her. She has taken risks that most would never have dared to even think of pursuing–including piloting, quitting her job to be a stained glass artisan, moving 3,000 miles away, establishing a publishing company, parasailing. And–oh, yeah–she was a scientist early on, interesting in biology, so she’s quite familiar with the scientific method!
Look around you; think about who you know who has that spirit and that quest. I can think of one off the bat (Ph.D.s in botany and psychology, a passion for horses and dancing and out-of-date couture). They’re there, and they’re living the experimental (and experiential) life.
And now–back to the morosity and self-judgment (remember the first paragraph?!). It was triggered by looking at introductions made by people who are signed up for a course in Positive Psychology I’m taking at Kripalu, starting next week. (Ironic that people taking positive psychology send me into a tailspin, right?!) These bios, the information people chose to write about, painted pictures of very, very accomplished people. Ph.D.s, pharmacist yogis, coaches, lawyers, people who had pursued dreams. I felt like an interloper: No advanced degree, no established business, not even a steady yoga practice these days. What the hell was I thinking? I didn’t belong there.
But then. Then I remembered one of the reasons I signed up for the course (aside from and interest and belief in the topic): my desire to change the mix of the 5 people I spend the most time with. And guess what: these are the types of people I want to be with–smart, evolving, excited, passionate, questing, questioning, spiritual. And I started crafting my bio in my head to honor their influence on me and all I hope to learn from and with them.
Yup, experimenting with life.
The Uncommon Zone 
See opportunity. Make decision – yes, no, later, decide later. Plan of attack. Act. Evaluate. Second decision – resolve to continue, do something a little different, take success and lessons learned and move on, figure out what went wrong.
Yes, life is series of choices. I’m not sure, however, how many people actually evaluate–or, more to the core–realize they are making a choice when they choose to do nothing.
Thank you for all the kind words, but what to you seemed courageous to me seemed simply what I could or needed to do at the time. Wow – talk about different perspectives! While you feel unaccomplished, I see a woman with the amazing self confidence to put her heart and soul into music and to perform in public with a heavenly voice. You took a very difficult and challenging path, studying voice and performing professionally – now THAT’s courage! You remade your physical self with determination and dedication, something I have never been able to accomplish. And you have taken up kayaking, learning about wines, drawing, dancing, and actively going alone to places to meet people – again, something I never could bring myself to do. You have studied difficult science and aced every course at a time when most people have no interest in studying anything beyond the latest so-called reality show idiocy. You have intelligence and intellectual curiosity combined with an artist’s soul, and I expect you will find yourself to be one of the 5 people your Kripalu colleagues will want surrounding them!
Funny how we both look at what we did as just “simply what I could or needed to do at the time”! I remember getting annoyed when our mother would (to me, over)praise me for something that either I didn’t think was all that great or that was just so fundamental that I didn’t understand why she was praising it, since it was just me and not an “accomplishment.” Yes, perspective is everything. And thank YOU for your kind words–especially that last sentence. It really struck me, as I had not even considered that I could be one of five for someone else. Again, perspective.